In my last blog post, I hinted at a stressful family situation, but didn’t feel like writing about it back then. A few days passed and the situation calmed down a little, and because it is going to be a permanent issue that is affecting me quite a bit, I’m going to write about it today.
It appears that my sister suffers from “emotionally unstable personality disorder”, better known as “Borderline”. In retrospect, there are many hints at this even from years ago, but last weekend and the first couple of days afterwards were really bad. Aggressive outbreaks coupled with paranoia – to the degree where it downright scared me.
Because of my own tests at the hospital, I have become somewhat sensitive to the topic and her behaviour alarmed me, so I compared the symptoms of what I could see in her to the diagnostic criteria of the DSM-IV; borderline personality disorder described it very accurately. I showed it to my mother afterwards, who agreed with me, and we eventually broke it to my sister…
Before, I spent hours trying to mediate between my sister and my mother, who were constantly fighting with each other, and even more hours talking to my mother in private. She didn’t really grasp that there was no logic behind my sister’s behaviour that would reveal itself to anyone else without explanation… Those were very exhausting days.
My sister has been diagnosed with ADHD almost 25 years ago, and it appears that there is a significant comorbidity of ADHD and borderline personality disorder. ADHD is also the reason we didn’t suspect anything earlier – we were used to a certain degree of aggressive or inappropriate behaviour from her.
I offered my sister help and support in finding a place for therapy, because on top of everything else, she’s too afraid to call and inquire about options.
If this had happened only a few months ago, I would inevitably have crashed (even deeper) into a depression afterwards, so considering the circumstances, I’m holding up ok. My eyeballs are inflamed again, a somatic symptom I had been rid of for good, or so I thought, and I feel stressed and exhausted; I need a little break even more now.